


Sisters, Past Present and Future

by lizznotliz



Category: Dimension 20 (Web Series)
Genre: Campaign 05: A Crown of Candy, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:16:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27656039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lizznotliz/pseuds/lizznotliz
Summary: It starts with quiet good mornings and stilted how are yous, awkward invitations to brunch in the gardens and hesitant offers for yet another tour around the castle. They orbit each other so carefully, mindful not to start another war and desperate to find the kind of peace that they both desperately crave.Ruby and Saccharina in Castle Candy, trying to figure out how to be sisters.
Relationships: Saccharina Frostwhip & Ruby Rocks
Comments: 11
Kudos: 49





	Sisters, Past Present and Future

The day that Amethar and Caramelinda are set to leave for Comida, he takes Ruby down to the hall of statues and they stand in the shadows of the Rocks sisters. They’ve moved some things around recently because Amethar coaxed the old sculptor who made these statues out of retirement; soon a statue of Jet will join them. The Rocks sisters no longer stand at the four cardinal directions but rather in a lopsided arc in the center of the room, waiting for Jet to make them a complete circle.

Like everything else in Ruby’s life right now, it’s just a little off and a little wrong, but she’s learning to accept it.

“Sure you don’t want to come?” Amethar asks. He’s looking up at Sapphria, not down at Ruby. She doesn’t mind. She’s been thinking a lot about her Aunt Sapphria lately. All of her aunts, really: the lives they lead, the secrets they kept, the deaths that came too soon. Ruby thinks maybe the women in this family are cursed to die young, and she wonders if she and Saccharina will manage to buck the trend.

Her father’s question is a gift, one last chance to change her mind, but it’s not one she’s willing to accept right now. “I told Saccharina I would stay, so I’m staying. We’ll be down for the official coronation soon enough. But right now...” In the pre-dawn light, Ruby can almost convince herself that Sapphria is looking right through her. Jet used to be able to do that. “I need to be a little sister, right now, not an imperial princess.”

Amethar nods, then wraps his arm around her shoulder and gives her a side-hug. His sleeve catches against the chain on her Locket of the Sweetest Heart, and all Ruby can feel for a moment is the hole that’s left behind: in their family, in this hall of statues. Her father leans over and presses a kiss to the top of her head.

“Proud of you,” he whispers, squeezes her shoulder one more time, then stands up straight and clears his throat. “Just promise me you two won’t kill each other while I’m away.”

Ruby laughs, just a little. It’s not funny, but she wants it to be. “I promise, Pops. I think we… we are both past that. Can’t promise we won’t damage the castle, though.”

“Eh, it’s Saccharina’s castle now. Might as well redecorate a little.”

***

Sir Theobald stays because of course Theo stays, because Ruby had never even considered that Theo _wouldn’t_ stay until he tells her that her father has offered him the position of head of the Imperial Emperor’s Guard.

“You can’t _go_!” She blurts, standing in the great hall as her parents exchange some parting wisdom with Saccharina on the other side of the room. Her voice holds all the childish indignation she can muster, and Theo must hear it because he gives her a smile that’s a little frustrated and a little tired. It’s a smile she’s familiar with, one he used to give her and Jet all the time, but it doesn’t raise her hackles the way it used to. Now she recognizes the love behind it.

“I thanked the Emperor for his flattering offer and told him I would rather serve Candia, if he would permit me.”

“And he said yes.”

Theo nods: “I think he was glad to hear I would be hovering over you and the queen, rather than him.” Ruby smiles. Theo smiles back, reflexively, then looks pensive for a moment. When he speaks again, he is quiet and insistent. “I want you to know, I’m not... there isn’t... I’m not going to choose between the two of you. You and Saccharina. I’m choosing both of you; I am happy to serve you both, to serve this _family_.”

Ruby thinks about the night Jet died, when she fled from the shop, bleeding and weeping, and her only thought was to find Sir Theo. She had faith he would be there, would fix things, would save them, and she feels foolish for the way that faith faltered as soon as Saccharina arrived. Theo is as constant as... well, Ruby thinks maybe Theo is the most constant thing she has in her life now that Jet is gone and her parents are moving away. Maybe he’s always been the constant in her life.

“I… thank you. I should say that more often.” Theo shakes his head a little, like the thanks are not necessary, and they may not be but that doesn’t make them any less sincere. Ruby wishes, even after everything that’s happened, that they had the kind of relationship where she could tell him that in her lowest moment he was the first person she thought of, but instead she asks, “Could I beg a favor from you?”

“Of course, Princess.”

“If I ever forget that, that you’ve chosen us both and that we’re all on the same side, will you remind me?”

Theo smiles at her again, and he looks proud, and Ruby wishes he wasn’t so formal because she would really like to hug him right now. He bows his head a little and rests his fist against his heart and says, “Of course. It would be my honor.”

***

And then Saccharina and Ruby are left alone in the castle.

Well, not entirely alone. There is, of course, everyone who works at the castle, all the guards and attendants, but it certainly feels like they are the only two people left in the castle as they try to establish some sort of relationship.

It starts with quiet _good mornings_ and stilted _how are you_ s, awkward invitations to brunch in the gardens and hesitant offers for yet another tour around the castle. They orbit each other so carefully, mindful not to start another war and desperate to find the kind of peace that they both desperately crave.

It’s not easy and it’s not perfect, but the daughters of Amethar have always been stubborn, always known what they wanted: Ruby wants a life she doesn’t feel compelled to run from, Saccharina wants people she can trust to watch her back, and they both want a sister that feels real and true. Saccharina’s willing to work for it, the way she’s worked for everything else in her life, and it’s fair to say that Ruby’s not afraid of hard work either. She knows her mother and her late tutor might find that difficult to believe, but she’s always been one to try hardest for the things she actually cared about. Her love of acrobatics and the circus were what once consumed her thoughts and time, and back then she had the bruised knees and raw palms to prove it. Now she’s focused on her relationship with Saccharina with the same kind of intensity.

The real issue, she thinks, is that she’s never been a little sister before.

Technically, yes, Jet was older, but they were twins. It was different. Everything is different of course, not just the age gap. Sometimes Ruby looks at Saccharina and thinks the only thing they have in common is their father’s blood and a prayer that they can build something out of nothing.

It’s not much, but it’s more than she had a few weeks ago.

At least they are both learning how to be sisters, together. That’s the saving grace in all of this: Saccharina is as lost as she is. Ruby feels ill-prepared for some kind of cosmic exam, perhaps ironically, since Ruby has been ill-prepared for several exams in her life but it’s never felt quite so dire as right now.

But she smiles warmly at breakfast, and she takes a walk through the gardens after lunch, and before dinner she shows Saccharina another secret passageway, and it’s something.

***

The first time Ruby goes to Comida, Saccharina comes, too; it’s to be their first official appearance as the Queen of Candia and the Imperial Princess. If Saccharina finds it strange that Ruby spends the entire first leg of the journey on the Sucrosi Road hunched in her seat, her muscles taut and eyes constantly fixed on the fields around them, she doesn’t say a word. The signing of the new concord is happening in a week’s time and that’s when Amethar will be formally installed as emperor. In the carriage, they study dossiers that Caramelinda sent ahead to Sir Theo weeks ago; neither of them really looked at them before, which Theo so helpfully reminds them of every few minutes, but at least they have a few hours’ time to cram on all the names and faces of visiting dignitaries.

There are feasts and tournaments to attend throughout the week; the latter events leave Ruby stressed and cross, so much so that Saccharina actually takes her hand in the middle of the melee and doesn’t let go until Amethar announces the winner. At Caramelida’s suggestion there is also a flower show, displaying the best and most beautiful plants that Calorum has to offer; Ruby spends as much time as propriety allows at Candia’s patch of soil in the showcase garden, watching Liam tend to the native flowers as Saccharina’s Master Gardener. It’s so strange, being there without Jet, remembering how things went the last time they were in the capitol, but it helps having Saccharina nearby. She is so nervous about making a good impression on everyone else in the Concord that Ruby finds she is an excellent distraction; if she’s feeding Saccharina names and titles, reminding her of her schedule, then she doesn’t have to think about chocolate blood and bread spies and Vegetanian lotharios.

When Amethar is crowned Emperor on the book of St. Citrina, the crowd around Ruby swells and shouts, and a new age of peace is born. From her spot on the dais as the Imperial Princess, she looks out to the Candian delegation and sees Liam whistling with two fingers in his mouth, sees Sir Theobald clapping as professionally as possible, and then sees Saccharina, stiff and solemn and straightbacked with her chin held high. Ruby catches her eye and mouths, _you can celebrate_. Saccharina pauses for a long moment, like she’s trying to decide if Ruby’s being honest or trying to get her into trouble, but then she nods, trusting, and punches a fist in the air, giving a marauder’s war cry that carries above the noise of the crowd. Ruby grins, grateful for the trust, and for the smile the sound brings to her father’s face, his eldest daughter’s joy granting him a moment of levity in an otherwise stressful day.

It’s not a bad trip, all things considered. Ruby’s emotions feel so close to the surface the entire week, the ache of missing Jet a fresh wound, but every time she looks up Saccharina is there, and it’s not the same but it’s better than the empty space that would have been there otherwise.

***

“So what shall we do about Liam and Primsy?”

They’re standing on the ramparts overlooking the inner courtyard. Liam has been working on it lately, a special project, trying to bring some of the royal gardens inside the castle walls. The morning that Saccharina officially declared him to be Candia’s Master Gardener, she told him he had free reign over the royal lands to cultivate as he saw fit. Ruby thought he hadn’t looked that happy since Preston was alive and she found herself fiercely grateful for Saccharina’s kindness in that moment.

“What shall we _do_ about them?” Ruby repeats, questioning.

Saccharina nods, then turns her back on the courtyard and leans against the stone wall of the ramparts to look at Ruby. Up here, away from the servants and attendants, she is slightly more relaxed; not quite as at ease as she used to be surrounded by her marauders in the mountains, but she’s definitely getting more comfortable around Ruby. “Yeah, they were definitely flirting at my coronation, right? Should we…” she wiggles her fingers, “meddle?”

Something deep in Ruby’s gut screams _yes!_ , a mischievous twin instinct that she hasn’t quite divested from herself. If it was Jet asking, well, Jet wouldn’t have asked at all; she would have absolutely started plotting a way to forge love letters or force Liam and Primsy into all sorts of compromising situations. But while Saccharina doesn’t seem opposed to such mischief, she also seems to be genuinely asking for Ruby’s opinion. But it’s more than that: less _is this a good idea?_ and more _will they hate me if I’m wrong?_

“Are you asking as a queen, or a cousin?”

Saccharina looks surprised for a moment, perhaps that Ruby has read her so clearly, but covers it quickly. She turns back around to gaze out at the courtyard again, at Liam kneeling in the dirt in his overalls. It’s a warm day and his hair is streaked through with soil, like he keeps having to push his sweaty hair back with his dirty gardening gloves. “Do you have an answer for each?”

For all Ruby eschewed her mother’s royal etiquette lessons, there are a few things she’s learned over the last year. “As queen, I’d let it lie. At least wait to see if Primsy makes some sort of formal declaration of intent, or maybe comes to you in private to ask about a proper courting. Liam is not in line for the throne, so he’s clearly free to do as he wishes, but he is a count in service to the queen, so you would at least be consulted if he was to become an official suitor of the ruling duchess of the Dairy Islands.”

“Duly noted.”

“However, as a cousin,” and Ruby leans on her elbows against the ramparts, pausing for half a second before bumping her shoulder gently against Saccharina’s. She’s never done that before but it feels… right, in this situation. “As his cousins, I’m sure we could come up with some excuses for them to visit each other, give them a chance to see each other informally. Liam doesn’t need an excuse to leave Manylicks anymore and, as Candia’s strongest ally, the Dairy Islands aren’t in such dire straits either. Primsy’s young and recently widowed, so she still has a few years left before someone really tries to marry her off. Still, if the new queen of Candia wanted to do some sort of cultural exchange…” Ruby lets the suggestion hang in the air, one eyebrow raised.

Saccharina nods. “Perhaps as a gesture of our renewed alliance, I could extend the services of my Master Gardener to the Duchess, offering some native plants as a gift with the expectation that Liam would accompany said gift and see to it that the plants were well-tended?”

“And if the Dairy Islands wanted to respond in kind, that could bring Liam back in a bit so no one felt pressured, and he would have some new plants to play with here at Castle Candy.” Ruby smirks, one eyebrow arched. “See? Not so hard.”

“You’re almost as devious as Swiftie,” Saccharina says, completely deadpan, and Ruby stands shocked for a moment before Saccharina starts to laugh. “No, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-- sweet saints, you should have seen your face.”

Ruby shoves her shoulder, and Saccharina keeps laughing, and something slots into place.

***

The first time they have a fight it’s over something stupid and it feels like the war all over again.

Looking back on it the next morning, Ruby can recognize that they both said ridiculous things that escalated because of their different experiences. As hard as they both try to understand where the other is coming from, how the other grew up, they’ll never really get it, and sometimes it’s like Saccharina grew up on an entirely different planet, her experiences are so foreign to Ruby. Their crossed wires became crossed words, which then turned into a screaming match in the corridor outside the hall of statues. By the time they were done shouting, Saccharina had tears of rage streaming down her face, Theo and Liam had both come running, the former holding Swirlwarden and the latter brandishing a garden spade, and Ruby--

Ruby was so scared. Scared that she had started another war, scared that she’d screwed everything up, scared that all the progress they’d made over the last several weeks was for naught, scared that maybe this was never going to work after all and trying was a mistake, scared that the castle wouldn’t feel safe anymore.

She didn’t want to leave. She was so tired of running away.

Theo had stepped between them and told Ruby to go to her room and cool off. Anger had flared up in her chest again, indignation rising, but then Theo had taken a step closer to her, towering above her, and reminded her quietly that he _wasn’t choosing sides anymore_. They were on the same team. Theo was there to help. She took a deep breath, then another, then nodded at Theo and walked back to her room.

When he found her later that day, still holed up in her room, he had his helmet in hand and a sheepish smile on his face. “I can’t exactly send the queen to her quarters,” he said.

“But you can send the imperial princess?”

And Theo had paused, unsure of the line for a moment, before shrugging and said, “I changed your diapers. I think that grants me a little leeway.”

“Have I ruined everything?”

“No, of course not.” He had shaken his head a little, more incredulous than expressing a negative answer, and said quietly. “She asked me the same thing, you know. I only just realized: neither of you have fought with a sister before.”

“I had a sister before this,” Ruby reminded him, because sometimes it felt like she was the only one who remembers Jet, and Theo had flinched a little.

“Of course you had a sister. But you and Jet never fought. You were two sides of the same coin.” Theo shook his head again. “Siblings fight. Your aunts did, anyway. I stood guard at the door for more than one screaming match after I entered your aunt Lazuli’s service.”

“And none of them started wars?”

“No,” Theo confirmed, smiling just a little. “A small battle, perhaps, but never a war. It’s hard for you both, I know. But I can see you trying. Now go on and apologize so you stop feeling so terrible.”

Ruby nodded and stood. “You can’t tell me what to do,” she said lightly as she passed him.

“Diapers,” he reminded her.

She stuck out her tongue: “I liked you better when you weren’t cool.”

Theo’s laughter followed her into the corridor, all the way to Saccharina’s room, and the tight knot of fear in her chest unraveled.

***

Whenever her parents write from Comida, they ask how things are going between her and Saccharina. Ruby always writes back that she’s trying to get to know her older sister but, when pressed, she has a hard time articulating anything about her.

It takes her a while to realize she should just ask questions. She’s never had to do that before.

Ruby never had to ask Jet anything because Jet was always just _there_. They did everything together, and Jet told her everything, so she never had to pry and pull and tease information out of her.

Where Jet was an open book, the exact same book as her, Saccharina is a locked box in the bottom of a cave. But Ruby has a torch and a key, and all she has to do is use them.

_What’s your favorite color? Do you like living here? Have you got a favorite book? Would you like to see the sights in Dulcington?_

But it’s not just asking, it’s answering, too. It’s easier to get Saccharina to respond, Ruby learns, if she offers up something first.

“I wanted to be a circus performer when I was younger,” Ruby says one afternoon when they’re going over missives from some of the other heads of state. One of them has invited Saccharina to a harvest festival as part of some diplomatic initiative, and there is to be a circus there. Ruby sets her chin on her hand. “Well. I still do, if we’re being honest.”

“That explains finding you walking along the edge of the ramparts the other day.” Saccharina shivers a little, like the sight of Ruby in such a precarious position still bothers her. Ruby thinks that’s a little silly, since Saccharina regularly takes rides across the countryside on the back of a dragon, but whatever.

“What about you?” Ruby asks, gesturing broadly. “What did you want to be when you were little?”

“Alive,” Saccharina says, too fast, like she didn’t really think about the answer and maybe she wouldn’t have said it if she had. The word punches Ruby in the center of her chest, and she feels terrified for a moment; she is retroactively so scared for her sister, for the life that she lead, for the childhood she had. Saccharina goes utterly still and doesn’t look over at Ruby, and Ruby doesn’t know how to respond, or whether she should at all.

Alive. Saccharina just wanted to be _alive_.

Ruby wishes Jet had wanted the same thing.

***

The morning of the anniversary of Jet’s death is unseasonably wet and cold, and it storms hard enough that Amethar and Caramelinda’s convoy from the capital is postponed. Which is… fine, Ruby thinks, because she’s not sure she is up for even seeing her parents today. A year ago today she left her sister to die in a lingerie shop, and although her parents have never, ever blamed her for running, she still blames herself and she’s not sure she deserves their comfort, or to share in their sorrow, on this day.

So she spends the morning curled up in bed, bedroom door shut to the rest of the world, clutching her locket and tracing over the scar on her side. She feels hollow, and it reminds her so much of those dark days on the Dairy Island ship right after they fled that she can almost feel her bed roll with the waves. When she doesn’t come down for breakfast, Theo comes to check on her but he doesn’t open the door when she calls out for him to go away. Instead, he leaves Princess, and the Familiar slides under the crack of the door and glides up onto her bed to curl up on her shoulder. She’s not sure how she feels about that, but she appreciates Sir Theo’s gesture.

An hour later, a note slides under her door: a small, ripped piece of paper with messy twinspeak scrawled over it. Liam was never as good at it as Jet was, but the note is still legible. _Don’t forget: she said she loves you and you did the right thing._ She reads it once, then shoves it under her pillow. They are words she needs right now, but she can’t quite stomach them.

Ruby thinks she’ll be content to just waste the day away shut up in her room, wallowing in her grief, when Saccharina shoulders through the door just after noon. She’s carrying a tray piled with food and her fingertips are still crackling with bluish-purple light from whatever spell she used to pick the lock on Ruby’s bedroom door.

“You can throw me out in an hour, but you have to eat lunch,” Saccharina says, and her tone brooks no argument. “I insist on that much.”

“ _Insist_?” Ruby asks, and for the first time all day she feels something other than guilt or grief. “As my _queen_?” she snarls.

But Saccharina doesn’t rise to the bait: “As your sister.” Her voice wavers, just the tiniest bit, like she’s not one hundred percent certain this gambit is going to work, but her jaw is set in that stubborn way that makes Ruby’s flare of anger falter; even if Ruby yells at her, Saccharina’s not going to back down on this. “C’mon, sit up. You can’t eat lying down.”

Ruby struggles upright, wiping away tear tracks that Saccharina blessedly does not comment on, then smooths the blanket over her lap so Saccharina can set the tray down. It’s overflowing with all of Ruby’s favorite foods, and some of them are things the kitchen doesn’t normally put on the menu, so she knows Saccharina went to the trouble of asking Sir Theo and maybe the royal chef what Ruby might like. Ruby knows that her parents care, that Theo and Liam care, but this is a little more… something, and her eyes water again.

“I can’t… this is too much food. I can’t eat all of this.”

“Well, then it’s a good thing I haven’t had lunch yet either.” Saccharina sits down on the bed, legs crossed, and she wiggles her toes against Ruby’s. “Is this completely out of line?” she asks quietly.

Ruby doesn’t answer, because she honestly doesn’t know - she feels rather _handled_ at the moment - and instead grabs an apple and bites down on it. Saccharina nods, accepting that answer, and starts eating, too.

After several minutes of silent eating - nothing really tastes like anything today, if Ruby’s being honest, because she feels so terrible, and in the back of her head she realizes what a waste it is to have all of her favorites on a day when everything feels empty - Saccharina taps her foot, swallows, and says, “Tell me about her.”

“What?”

Saccharina chews on her lip a moment, then says, “Look, I get _why_ , but sometimes getting you to talk about Jet is like pulling teeth. I won’t push if you don’t want me to, but if you’re going to spend all day in bed _thinking_ about her, you may just as well _talk_ about her.”

It’s quiet again, for a little while, as Ruby tries to figure out if that’s something she’s up for, mentally or emotionally or physically. Yeah, she’s missing Jet something fierce, and she’s spent all day thinking about how young and stupid they were when they were little, and how brave Jet was when things got hard, and how everything shattered when the light in the locket went out, but there’s a difference between thinking about that and saying it out loud. She’s not even sure if Saccharina knows how Jet died, or that Ruby ran away. How could she possibly tell Saccharina that she ran away?

“If it helps,” Saccharina says, so quietly that Ruby almost doesn’t hear her, “she was my sister, too.”

Ruby’s never thought of that before. Not once, in the last several months. Jet was her sister, and Saccharina is her sister, but never once has she considered that Jet and Saccharina were sisters, too.

“I know that might not mean much, but I’d like to know her.” Saccharina shrugs. “We could start with something easy? Like… the statue. Is it a good likeness?”

Ruby nods, slowly, taking the easy entrance to the conversation that she’s offering. Jet was recently added to the hall of statues. “Yeah. It is. The smirk especially.”

“Gives her a lot more personality than the aunts,” Saccharina notes, then makes her face go stony and solemn like the expressions on the faces of the statutes of their aunts. A smile twitches at the edge of Ruby’s lips, then disappears again. “Tell me something else.”

“She wanted to fight. Like Aunt Rococoa.” There, that’s something true. “She wanted to be a knight for Theo. She--” Another fleeting smile, and this time Saccharina returns it, egging her on. “She used to steal bits of Theo’s armor, when we were kids, so he’d go stomping around all grumpy looking for it and then she would return it, insisting that this meant she was his squire.”

“How old?”

“Eight or nine?” Ruby shrugs. It was a long time ago. “She took Swirlwarden once and Theo was… it’s got Lazuli protection magic in it and everyone freaked out. Dad actually intervened then. Told us we weren’t ever supposed to touch that. She stopped taking his stuff after that, but she never stopped asking him to teach her how to fight.”

Princess winds around Ruby’s arm and squeezes a little, like a snake hug, and it’s both comforting and bizarre. Saccharina watches the Familiar and says, “Oh. _Princess_. Right.”

“Never put that together?”

“Not really.”

They eat for a while longer, and Saccharina has to push food towards Ruby a couple times to insist she keeps eating, but it’s okay. Ruby’s not sure she would say it’s _nice_ but it’s _okay_. Saccharina asks a few more questions, surface-level things Ruby doesn’t mind sharing about Jet, and it feels like progress has been made without completely ringing Ruby out. When the tray is clear, Saccharina slides off the bed and picks up the tray, then shrugs at Ruby.

“Okay, well, I won’t bother you the rest of the day. And you’re obviously invited to dinner, but if you don’t show up I won’t send anyone after you. I told you I would insist on lunch and you gave me that. So.” Saccharina shrugs again, like she’s not really sure how to end this, and Ruby appreciates that this is just as strange for her as it is for Ruby. Saccharina pauses for a moment, then reaches out and takes Ruby’s hand and squeezes it once, hard, like there’s more she wants to say but isn’t sure how or even if she should, and then she pulls away and heads for the door.

Just before she opens it, she looks over her shoulder and says, “I realized recently, there was something I never said when we met. I’m sorry for your loss.”

And then she’s gone, and Ruby’s alone in the room, and she marvels at how she can feel alone and not alone at the same time.

***

Theo comes rushing into the great hall one morning, just after breakfast, and the only reason the sight of him moving so fast doesn’t send Ruby into a panic is that his arms are full of books. They’re large, dusty tomes, and he’s carrying so many he can hardly see over them, but he hurries across the room and dumps them onto the table. A few of them scatter and slide across the surface, and Saccharina reaches out to stop one just shy of her goblet of cola.

“I almost forgot about these,” Theo says, and he looks a little wild-eyed, but in a good way. “I’ve had them hidden for so long--”

“Sir Theo, what--”

“They’re Lazuli’s.” Saccharina gapes and immediately picks up the closest book. Theo looks at Ruby and continues, “Do you remember, on the road, when I told you to keep learning magic? I was going to give you these when we got back from the tournament but that obviously never happened. Lazuli asked me to hide them and keep them safe before she died, and things have been so busy since Candia expanded--”

And the magic expanded along with it. That’s been the hardest thing Saccharina’s had to deal with since taking the crown. The expansion of Candia’s borders was one thing, but the explosion of magic was entirely another. Not that they were opposed to spreading magic, but there weren’t many skilled practitioners left and wild magic was spreading throughout the countryside. With Lazuli’s magic books, they might actually get a handle on things.

Saccharina smiles up from a book open on her lap, looking as happy as Ruby’s ever seen her. “Thank you, Sir Theo. I will undoubtedly seek your council at some point, I’m sure, to help me decipher her personal notes.”

Ruby flips open the book closest to her and sees her aunt Lazuli’s handwriting scribbled along the margins, as well as in between paragraphs, and large diagrams drawn on the book’s endpapers. She recognizes the handwriting from an inscription in a book of poems in her mother’s study, a gift from Lazuli on the day of their engagement. She flips through a few more pages and is surprised to find her mother’s handwriting, too; not often, but once or twice every chapter, and usually questioning something Lazuli had noted, as though Caramelinda had been proofreading her spellwork.

Ruby turns one of those pages toward Saccharina: “My mother may be of some help as well.”

“Yes, of course,” Saccharina says diplomatically. “I would appreciate that.”

Whatever was on the queen’s agenda for the day has been completely derailed by the arrival of Lazuli’s magic books, and they spend the whole morning in the great hall pouring over the tomes. When Theo insists they break for lunch, Saccharina suggests they eat in the courtyard, and they make their way outside, blinking in the harsh sunlight after a morning spent staring at faded text and dusty pages.

A memory springs unbidden to Ruby’s mind and, before she can talk herself out of it, she says aloud, “Jet wanted to start a kindergarten.”

Saccharina stops walking. Theo pauses, too, but he is well-trained enough not to turn around and stare at Ruby. “What?” Saccharina asks.

Ruby swallows. Has she ever brought up Jet first? “I was just-- I just remembered something Jet said. Before. Obviously. She said when she became king, she wanted to start a kindergarten, so people could learn magic. I- I had forgotten about that.”

And Saccharina doesn’t bat an eyelash, doesn’t stare, doesn’t laugh; she just takes Ruby’s hand and tucks it into the crook of her arm so they’re walking side-by-side into the courtyard and says, “Well, I think that is certainly something we can look into.”

***

Liam comes back from a fortnight in the Dairy Islands with a smile on his face and a milk carton kitten under his arm. She’s creamy white from nose to tail, and Liam says that Primsy named her Mozzy, and the kitten sits on his shoulder when they all have dinner together that night to welcome the Master Gardener back home. As the food is being served, Ruby and Saccharina ask pointed but appropriate questions about the state of the Islands, Primsy’s health, and the diplomatic mission that Liam was ostensibly sent on. As soon as the attendants have returned to the kitchen, Ruby leans her elbows on the table and asks, “Well? How’d it go?”

Saccharina laughs, loud and genuine, at the look of embarrassed bewilderment that settles on Liam’s face, the rest of his face as pink as his nose. “I-- it-- fine?”

“Did you hold hands?” Ruby presses, knowing how much he enjoyed their stroll the last time they saw each other.

Liam is flustered again, and he drops his head down to look at his plate, pushing food around with his fork. “I, y’know, it was good. Really good. She’s good.”

Saccharina laughs again, and Ruby catches her eye and joins her, and after a minute even Liam starts to laugh, the dining hall filling with their joy and teasing, and Ruby can’t remember the last time she laughed like this.

It was probably before Jet died.

And she expects, for a moment, that this feeling will be cut short, that the thought of Jet will steal the joy away, but it doesn’t. Missing Jet doesn’t always have to mean feeling sad, she thinks. Maybe just thinking of her now, in the midst of the joy, is still a way to still share it with her.

Later that night, Liam knocks lightly on Ruby’s bedroom door. He has Mozzy in the front pocket of his overalls, and the kitten is dozing quietly, safe against his chest. Ruby scratches her gently between the ears and Mozzy purrs but doesn’t open her eyes. When she pulls her attention away from the cat and back at Liam, he’s holding something out to her, a trinket dangling from his fist.

“I thought maybe it was time I gave this back,” he says, and Ruby slowly, slowly takes the Locket of the Sweetest Heart from him.

“What am I supposed to do with it?”

Liam stares at her for a long moment, then shrugs and leans forward to hug her very carefully, Mozzy pressed between them. “You don’t have to do anything with it,” Liam says, and he sounds like he used to when they were growing up, when the world hadn’t hurt them yet. “But I wanted you to have it back, just in case.”

***

The second time Ruby goes to Comida, she goes alone.

Her father has requested her presence as the imperial princess, for some appearances around the concord and to sit for the official portrait. It’s not that Saccharina _isn’t_ invited, but she does have Candia to govern, and it’s important to keep up the appearance that the Emperor has divested himself from Candia. It’s all fully above-board and understandable given the complex power structures of this family.

Ruby can tell, though, that Saccharina is upset about the singular invitation.

She lets her stew about it for three days, hoping she’ll start the conversation herself, but eventually gives up and just barges into Saccharina’s room late one night when there’s no one around to disturb them. She knocks twice, then shoulders open the door, and is sitting at the foot of Saccharina’s bed before the Queen of Candia even notices that she’s there.

“Is it that _you_ didn’t get invited, or that _I’m_ going?” Ruby asks, jumping right in. She figured out recently that, although Saccharina minds her own speech so carefully, she appreciates bluntness in those around her. Blunt is often honest, and honesty is something she craves. If this is going to work - this sisterhood, this family - then Ruby’s just going to have to come out and say it sometimes.

Saccharina blinks, clearly startled for a moment, before folding her hands behind her back and standing with her feet shoulder-width apart. Ruby’s seen Theo and the other guards stand like that before. It’s defensive, without trying to look it.

“The latter,” Saccharina admits after a moment. She’s upset that Ruby is going at all. “I understand it but,” she shrugs a little, trying to look unaffected, but Ruby can see the muscle in her jaw twitch. Saccharina clears her throat. “Fine. I’m used to people leaving and not coming back. So.”

Based on what she knows, on the stories she’s heard, that makes sense. Ruby can understand how her leaving might make Saccharina feel abandoned, even if she’s leaving at their father’s invitation. “Well. You can ask. If that would help?”

Saccharina is quiet for a long minute, clearly wrestling with the fact that she’s embarrassed by her previous admission. Ruby waits her out, picking at a thread in the blanket that is folded on Saccharina’s bed. It’s gold and soft and a gift from Caramelinda for her birthday just a few weeks ago. “Ruby.” Ruby looks up. Saccharina is standing tall again, that chin-high queenly look on her face, but her voice is quiet. “When will you be back?”

“Barring any assassinations, I’ll be back in one week.”

When she returns, exactly one week later, Saccharina is waiting at the front gates of the castle to receive her carriage. She’s trying to hold back a blinding smile, trying to look regal and serene and unaffected, but when Ruby jumps down and winks at her, a broad grin overtakes the queen’s face.

And Ruby returns it, and is surprised to find that she… she’s glad to be back. She’s glad to see Saccharina. She missed being here.

The Locket of the Sweetest Heart pulses in her pocket. She wraps her hand around it as Saccharina gestures for her to come inside. The locket is warm and bright - maybe not the same way it used to be, but more than it has been in quite some time - and Ruby holds it so tight that the edges dig into her fingers. She lets Saccharina usher her inside, listens to the questions she asks about fancy dinner parties and the health of their father, and Ruby lets go of the locket and focuses on the conversation.

She’s not ready to let go of the locket yet, but it’s warm by her side, and she thinks she loves her sister.


End file.
